SAHM (stay-at-home-mum) vs. Working Mum

As a graduate, I had never thought about quitting my job for my family before I had kids. However, like many other mothers, I went through the stage of a dilemma considering whether I should quit my job and be a full time stay-at-home-mother(SAHM). Due to some circumstances, I stopped working for about a year each for both my kids and eventually returned to work. In that sense, I was lucky to have the opportunity to experience both roles.

From my experience, as a working mother, juggling between family and career is always challenging. The most difficult part is to find a good and reliable caretaker to look after the kids while at work. Next comes the problem of housework - the main being meal preparation, laundry and cleaning the house. A lot of women choose to quit their job due to the former - they believe that they are the best caretaker of their kids - which is true but only to a certain extend. I believe that every individual is different and not everyone is "suitable" to be a homemaker. Some women are very efficient in their job but not so efficient when they stay at home. For them, it may be better to leave their children to an experienced caretaker while they go to work. The housework portion can be solved by either hiring manpower or using more automated machines.

To me, SAHM equals to supermom! It is a job without pay that one cannot leave behind "after working hours"! It is both physically and mentally draining, especially when one takes care of very young chlidren. It is not easy to feel "job satisfaction" and "sense of achievement" as the results are intangible and there is no instant reward. Besides, the financial pressure is there as one is not generating income and thus needs to be more careful with the expenditure. A capable SAHM is "expected" to be able to prepare meals and do most of the housework while taking care of the children, which is not easy if the young children cling on to you and you lack experience on how to handle them. The most irritating part is that people think it is a very easy job and you have a lot of free time! Salute to all the SAHMs!

I do believe that SAHM is good for the kid if the mum enjoys this job and is able to manage the stress. If you are the type who cannot "let go" of your children to another caregiver, it is better off for you to stay at home (provided that you can afford it) as you will be thinking about your children while at work and cannot do your job well. However, if you cannot let go of your career, there is no point for you to stay at home, have a miserable life and in the future regret giving up your career. There is no right or wrong. In either case, you may feel guilty - when I was an SAHM, at times, I felt guilty for not fully utilizing my capability to contribute to the society.

Consider all the pros and cons. Once you make up your mind, execute your plan and look forward. If you choose to work, try to leave behind your children while you are at work, and leave behind your work when you are at home. Make an effort to spend "quality" time with your kids. If you are an SAHM, make an effort to have some time for yourself, a short break away from the children/family to recharge yourself. Remember, parenting is a long journey. At any time, you can still change your mind. :)

Educational Toys from Gigamic (France)

I came across some interesting toys in Singapore Bookfest held by Popular bookstore. The games are all mind-teasing and made of good quality wood. We spent some time understanding the rules and trying out some of the games.

According to the salesperson, the company is called Gigamic. The games originated from France and won many awards. The distributor in Singapore is Avolution Pte Ltd (http://www.familydiy.com), with online stores and retail stores listed on the website; but the products are also being sold at some of the bigger Popular bookstores in Singapore.

Here are some interesting games we saw:

• Quoridor Kid. On a game board with 7x7 squares, to be played by 2-4 players, each assigned a mouse and a piece of cheese. The cheese is static and the aim of the game is for the mouse to eat the opponent’s cheese by moving the mouse one step at a time. The interesting part is that a 2-block width fence can be placed in between the squares to block your opponent’s move. This is a kid's version, simplified from the original Quoridor classic version which uses a 9x9 squares game board and the aim is to reach any of the 9 squares on the opponent’s baseline.
  

• Quarto. On a 4x4 game board, for 2 players with 16 game pieces of different attributes – black/white, short/tall, round/square, solid/hollow. Each player takes turn to put down a piece given by the opponent on the game board and the aim is to line up 4 pieces of the same attribute in a horizontal, vertical or diagonal row. It is not easy as you need to look at all 4 dimensions.

• Cathedral. The concept is very similar to Japanese boardgame Go, where 2 players take turn to put down a piece and capture the space surrounded by its own pieces. The pieces are of different sizes and imitate famous buildings of the world like the Pyramid, the Eiffel Towel and the Statue of Liberty, which makes it attractive.

• Katamino. A puzzle for single player, the aim is to fit in blocks of different shapes into an allocated rectangular space. It is quite common and I have seen a few other games with similar features, including one published by Popular bookstore.

In the end, we did not buy any as we already had a library of games at home and each game above cost at least SGD50. It is also a way to teach our children that we will not buy everything that we like.

Educational Toys from Germany: Luk (MiniLuk and BambinoLuk)

MiniLuk is a powerful IQ game for the children to develop their concentration and thinking skills. This toy originates from Germany and has good reputation with many years of history. Germans are well known for their intelligence so we have high confidence in this game. It has won many awards in the US and is being promoted worldwide.

MiniLuk learning system consists of a controller with 12 pieces of tiles and a set of books. The tiles are numbered from 1 to 12, and at the back of each tile is a simple unique pattern. Each page of the book contains 12 questions and 12 possible answers. The children will place the transparent part of the controller on the answer page and place the tiles on the answer following the number of the questions. After all tiles are placed at the respective answer, close the controller and flip it over. The pattern shown can be checked against the pattern in the book to confirm that all questions have been answered correctly. (You can view the demo here.) It is indeed an intelligent invention.

In addition, the power of this game is the unlimited potential expansion of the system with books of different contents at different levels that can be added on. Thus, depending on the child's ability, the level of difficulty can be adjusted by choosing the right book. Some examples of the book contents include:

• Visual recognition - finding the same picture. It can be very simple pictures for young children or pictures with very complicated patterns that look very similar to each other for advanced level.
• Visual recognition - matching slightly different pictures. For example, matching colors or shapes, matching different clothing with the same cloth pattern, matching shadows, matching rotated or mirror images, matching only part of the picture, matching the picture from a different view (front/back/top/side view).
  
• Logic - association of things from a similar category. For example, hammer with nail, pen with paper and teapot with cup.
  
• Logic - finding the missing parts. For example, bicycle without pedals, house without windows, and door without a knob.
  
• Logic - sequence of events. What will happen next? Find the picture.
  
• Mathematics - matching numbers, finding answers for equations.
  
• Language - grammar, phonics, vocab, spelling, etc.
  

As you can see, there is no limit to the kind of questions that can be incorporated into this system.

A "junior" version of MiniLuk is BambinoLuk which you can also find in the same website. It is a simplified Luk for younger children (2-4 years old), with larger tiles, 6 questions instead of 12, and it uses pictures (house, car, heart, flower, duck, apple) instead of numbers so that young children can recognize them at ease. The picture below is our collection of the games.


We first saw MiniLuk in Penang in 2006. Although very impressed, we did not buy it because of the price - it comes in a set of controller with 12 books for the price of RM600+! It is a big sum to invest and a risk to take if our child will like it and make full use of it. Very fortunately, not long after that my husband had a chance to visit Germany and he visited the local stores to check out this game. It is a popular game and the books are sold individually. He carefully chose 6 books with the controller for around RM200.

Our son was very interested and completed all the exercises. We wanted to buy more but could not find a good source. We found a cheap version of the system with inferior quality sold in night markets, but later realized that the contents are not well organized. We believe some people just want to make money copying the game and simply put in any contents without careful thought on how it can help the child.

Later we found in Singapore a shop in United Square, Intelligence Insight, the official dealer of Luk in this region. There are samples for the children to try out before buying for both MiniLuk and BambinoLuk. A set of 5-6 books are sold at around SGD100 each, and the controller is around SGD30. It may be cheaper in Germany or US if you have the way to send them back, but the dealers cannot ship the product out of the country. Recently one company in Penang, G-minimall offers this product. We bought some from each of the above.

Both my kids have benefited from this product. They learn to focus, look at the details, recognize and reason. Playing the game can help young children to strengthen their fine motor skills. Older children can play on their own independently. I highly recommend Luk for young children. It is value for money!

Housework Helper

Nobody can escape from managing housework. It is time consuming, tiring, and it is never ending! For busy parents, our focus should be more on the kids than the house chores. Besides using other manpower, here are some ways to help parents with housework.

Clothes dryer is the big savior when it comes to laundry. By using dryer, the clothes will be dry in about an hour! No more hanging the clothes, waiting for it to dry, worrying about the weather conditions and the space for hanging. Theoretically one also needs less sets of clothes for changing as dirty clothes will become clean within a few hours. Dryer is also a great help when it comes to bedsheets which occupy a lot of space for hanging. It can be used on most clothings made of cotton.

Another useful item that I discovered recently is Roomba from iRobot, an automatic vacuum cleaner. It is a round disc that crawls on the floor by itself, covering all the areas, and while crawling it vacuums the floor. It is an intelligent tool that learns the map of the house. It automatically avoids staircase or uneven surface; it moves around the barrier like tables and chairs; it can go under the bed or furniture; upon finishing, or when it is low on battery, it will go back to the charging station. Depending on the model, you can schedule Roomba to clean the floor at a certain timing, you can also use a "virtual war device" to limit the area that Roomba will clean.

Besides, I recommend using a good washing machine (front load / drum type) with the easy ironing, delicate washing and handwash options. A good washing machine does not wear out the clothes so fast, and helps to save time / effort on handwash and ironing. Both my washing machine and dryer are of Whirlpool brand, same brand so that I can stack them up. But I am sure many other brands offer the same features as well.

As parents, we have limited time. I really find the above items very useful. While they work for me, I can use the time on something else. They are all very good investments!

Retinoblastoma - Eye Cancer in Young Children

Hopefully by increasing the awareness of this disease, it will help to save more lives... of young children. This blog entry was also posted in my other blog Try To Be Healthy.


Early this year, I read about Retinoblastoma in the Reader's Digest magazine. It is a true story where two ladies became good friends over the Internet before they delivered their babies, and continued to share with each other their parenting experience. One day, one of them read about Retinoblastoma and recalled that she had seen the symptom in some pictures of her friend's baby - where the eye pupil appears white (or red). She quickly informed the friend and the child's life was saved. I thought it was quite a touching story.

Just a few weeks ago, a friend informed me that his toddler was diagnosed with Retinoblastoma at a late stage on one of her eyes and went for surgery to have her eye ball removed. I was very shocked and at the same time felt very sad. He was surprised that I knew what is Retinoblastoma as not many people are aware of this. If someone had observed the symptoms earlier on this little girl, it could have saved her from sacrificing one eye. This is why I decided to share information on this disease.

According to Wikipedia, Retinoblastoma happens about 1 in 15,000 children (rare, but it does happen to someone I know!), usually from 0-5 years old. Bilateral cases (both eyes are infected) are usually diagnosed within the first year, while unilateral cases (single eye is infected) at 2 years old. The symptoms of this disease include
- the pupil appears white (or red), similar to what we sometimes see in digital photos
- squint / crossed eyes
- deterioration of vision (very difficult to tell for young children)

90% of the patients have no family history of the disease. A patient may lose vision because the tumour develops in the cell of retina. Depending on the situation, surgery, laser treatment and common cancer treatments like chemotherapy and radiotherapy may be needed. Although it is a very treatable cancer with one of the best cure rates (95-98%) of all childhood cancers, early detection is still the key as in all cancer diseases.

Tell someone today. You may save precious life.

Cord Blood Stem Cell Storage at Birth

During my first pregnancy, my gynae introduced me to umbilical cord blood storage, which was fairly new in Malaysia back then. Umbilical cord blood contains stem cells. It could be used to treat certain genetically related blood diseases, for example leukemia, lymphoma, anemia and thalassemia. With the advance of medical research, in the future there might be more diseases which can be cured with the stem cells.

As the advertisement says, this is “once in a life time chance” to store the baby’s umbilical cord blood for possible use later to save his life. Personally, I think the chances of using it is very low, unless one has the family history of the diseases mentioned above which can be treated with a bone marrow transplant. However, nobody can guarantee this. So as an “insurance”, we decided to go for it for my first baby. In countries like US and Singapore, there are public cord blood banks that accept donations to be used for anyone in need. Unfortunately it was not available in Malaysia and we spent a one-time fee of RM2,000+ to collect the cord blood, followed by an annual storage fee of RM250 until the child reaches 18 years old, with StemLife. That was quite a few years back and I believe that the fees must have been revised to remain competitive in the market.

It was actually the first time for my gynae and the nurses to collect umbilical cord blood cell during my son’s birth at Penang Adventist Hospital. So it was a bit “out of routine” for them. The good thing is that we were not charged extra, as the gynae mentioned that she would impose charges for subsequent cord blood cell collections. I never confirmed this as we chose not to store our second child’s cord blood cell. As mentioned, we both think that the possibility to use it later is really low, and in case needed, there is still the stem cell of the sibling.

Stem cell technology is advancing everyday. In fact, as I just checked out the StemLife website, there is a testimony on foot ulcers of a diabetic patient cured with adult stem cells. And for those who missed out the cord blood banking, adult stem cell can still be possibly collected and stored.

This is just to share with you my limited knowledge on this topic. I believe every parent should be made aware of what stem cell is all about before the birth of the baby. Find out more about it and decide whether it is worth the money to insure on this. I personally do not believe in buying insurance policies for kids (unless it is for tax saving purposes). If there is one insurance policy that I would buy for my kid, this would be my choice.

Jigsaw Puzzles from Young

I enjoy playing jigsaw puzzles. So do my children, especially my eldest son who started to show great interest from young. Playing jigsaw puzzles can help to develop hand-eyes coordination skills for young children and train their concentration skills. This will prevent them from being too active and running around all the time. :)

When my son was 18 months old, we found the following wooden jigsaw puzzles in the US. They look interesting so we bought them for him. You can probably get these in major stores (WalMart, Toys'R'Us, Jusco). One famous brand of wooden puzzles I know of is Melissa & Doug.


It turned out to be a great toy and trains him the basics of playing jigsaw puzzles. Although the puzzle may look very easy to the adults, in the beginning it was very tough for him. First, he learnt to hold the pieces using the red "handle" / "knob" attached to each piece. Then, he must stabilize the piece, rotate it as needed to fit the piece into the "hole" - and of course he needed to recognize which "hole" the piece should go to. Every piece put in was a great effort and we always cheered and praised him whenever he succeeded, encouraged him when he was almost there. What I realized from this activity is that, in order to train your child to have patience, first, you must have the patience to train him/her. It requires a lot of patience from the parents to sit down with the child and guide him/her to solve the puzzle. Adults tend to want to help the children when we see that they are unable to do it, but it's important to let them try out and experience the failure. Of course, at times, we may need to guide them, especially in the beginning, perhaps by holding their hands to put in the pieces. Children (in fact, even adults) love to be praised. So keep giving them positive words to encourage them.

I cannot remember exactly how long it took him to master the skills to complete the puzzle, probably after a few months, but I remember how joyful and proud we felt when he mastered the skills. And he felt a great sense of accomplishment.

The next step is completing the "cardboard" jigsaw puzzles, which is the same material as the common jigsaw puzzles that we play with. Start with puzzles of big pieces with "frame", like below, which we also bought from the US. Increase the number of pieces from 4 pieces to 6 pieces, 10, 25, and decrease the size of the pieces. Eventually, as the child "graduates" from these "junior puzzles", s/he will be able to play with the conventional jigsaw puzzles.



It is very important to keep the interest of the child. After some time and some trials, a child may lose interest as it is beyond his/her capability to solve the puzzle. If you fail to keep the interest by praising, encouraging, guiding and demonstrating, just put the puzzle aside and do not force the child to continue. I remember my girl had very little patience when I first introduced her to the first wooden puzzles. I tried again after a few weeks but she gave up after a short while. This was repeated for a few times. It took her longer than her elder brother, but eventually she was also able to solve the puzzle.

Another tip to attract the children is to use their favorite characters like Thomas the Tank Engine, Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh. It worked with both my children. Something special like a puzzle that glows in the dark can also attract them. :)


Below shows another variation which I find very interesting. The 2 bears each consists of 3 pieces - head, upper body and lower body which can be changed. My girl enjoyed changing the clothes for the bears and she also learnt to match the top and bottom clothing by color and pattern.


Quite a number of people commented that my children are ahead of their peers in solving jigaw puzzles. This is due to exposure and practice. I believe that most other children, given the same opportunity, would be able to achieve the same thing as well. Practice makes perfect!

Recommended Reading: Personality Plus

I read this book Personality Plus for Parents by Florence Littauer in a confinement center after I delivered my first baby. I found it so interesting that I bought myself a copy and read it from time to time.

This book explains 4 major types of personality: Sunny Sanguine, Controlling Choleric, Meticulous Melancholy, and Pleasant Phlegmatic. Each personality represents a unique character, and each pair of personality (whether similar or different) when being put together creates a different type of relationship. The book touches on the possible scenarios and challenges, focusing specifically on parenting (right from the infancy stage) and cites many good examples.

As the name suggests, Sunny Sanguine is popular; s/he is the extrovert, the talker, the optimist. People who belong to this group long for attention and approvals, look for fun, excitement and hate dull tasks and routines. They are good in charming their parents and negotiating.

Controlling Choleric is the "commander" who is always strong-willed and wants his/her way followed. Decisive and stubborn, they tend to focus on getting things done, and may offend others. They are self-confident, aggressive and responsible.

Meticulous Melancholy is the perfectionist with high standards. They are generally the deep thinkers and good students. Dutiful and responsible, they are sensitive to others and may get depressed more easily.

Pleasant Phlegmatic is the least demanding of all. They are very compromising and mediate problems to avoid trouble. They have a casual attitude and tend to procrastinate.

By reading this book, I was able to identify the personality of my family members and understand better why they act in a certain way in some situations. As parents, it is good to
- understand our children's weaknesses and help them manage those weaknesses,
- know what to watch out as the children grow up,
- master the skills to effectively communicate with them,
- learn how to "tick" with them, and
- find out how to manage the similarity and differences between us.
As a result, we can better guide our children to the "correct" path.

We should accept our children as who they are and not forcing them to become like us. I believe that a healthy relationship between a parent and a child is a loving one with mutual understanding, trust and respect. I hope my children will always share with me their thoughts and problems they face. I am not trying to help them solve all their problems (sometimes they need to learn by themselves) but in the least I can be their listener and share their joy and pain together. I would want to be a friend my children can always turn to.

I highly recommend this book to parents who want to understand their children more and maintain a close relationship with them.

Love and respect are the most important prospects in any relationships (Jodie Foster).

My Toddler's Crying Problem

My 2-year-old little girl had been a little difficult to handle lately. She cried easily, day and night. It was disturbing especially during midnight, whereby she just burst into loud cries shouting "papa" or "mama" once she realized that neither of us were sleeping beside her, and it was difficult to calm her down and put her back into sleep without one of us being fully awake. Certainly, this had disturbed our sleep. Our tiredness due to lack of sleep had led to some other problems like lower tolerance level of her wrong actions - when she did something wrong and we punished her she started crying again... The cycle repeated and we could not break it...

I have been wondering if this can be due to the fact that I have recently returned to work after being a homemaker for 1 year plus. At first we did not think it was a big change to her because she has been attending a full day childcare for 9 months and all along she has been doing well. However, after the 3-day long weekend (with a public holiday), I noticed that she has been behaving well and I realized that what she wanted was more attention from the parents! She probably has felt the changes after I started working. Naturally, I feel tired at night after returning from work and have less energy and time to spend with her. Furthermore, I still need to do a little housework, and give some attention to the elder brother who is entering primary school next year, monitoring his progress in school related work. Sometimes I also need a break to watch TV / surf Internet, which doesn't make her feel very happy. Another big change for her is probably that I no longer take her to school every morning. Usually I leave home before she even got up. Although she is very attached to the father, she probably needs me around as well.

My girl had actually been very well behaved since birth, especially compared to the brother, who was a very difficult infant. (Nevertheless he has turned out to be one of the best behaved kids among his friends and makes us really proud of him.) She made little noises when she was hungry, seldom gave problems at night, slept early at night and slept through the nights from an early age. Sometimes when she woke up at 7am, she did not even cry to wake us up; she just stayed quiet by herself unless she was very hungry. As she grew into a toddler, her words always made us laugh, and she knows what to say at the right timing to melt our heart. :) So there must be a reason for her to cry - which I thought could be feeling insecure. Her cries during midnight may be due to nightmares as we punish or spank her during the day. (Well, some older people believe that this phenomena is caused by the disturb of some ghosts/spirits, but I prefer to look at it logically.)

Now the challenge is how I can keep up her good behavior during weekdays. I may need to boost my physical stamina by exercising more and taking supplements, or get someone to help with housework so that I can give her more attention at nights. Although sometimes I feel so sleepy and can't attend to her, I believe that my love to her will give me power to stay stronger... and help her go through this stage of hurdle. Pray for us!

Infant and Toddler Food

From birth to 6 months, the only food an infant needs is milk, and the best milk is breast milk. So during the first 6 months, mothers only need to concentrate on producing enough nutritious breast milk for her baby (by eating, drinking and resting enough). Breast milk is easily absorbed and digested. It also helps the infant to build a stronger immune system. In general, an infant who is being breastfed exclusively does not need to be fed any other liquid. Only those who are on formula feeding need to drink water to avoid constipation.

Generally, doctors do not advise any solid food before an infant is 6 months old as the body may not be ready yet. From the age of 6 months, as the first solid food, start with something creamy and smooth in texture. The easiest food to prepare is ripe bananas. Use a spoon to mash it and it's ready for feeding! Ripe pears is another option. Start with 1-2 spoons and slowly introduce more. Let the baby have some water after the feed.

The other type of food is homemade puree - our favourites were carrots and pumpkins (other options include potatoes and apples). Boil them until they are tender. Use blender to blend them and the food is ready. I usually prepared a few days' portion together, put them into small containers, kept them in the fridge or freezer, and consumed within 3-7 days. Some people make the food into ice cubes and keep in freezer so that it can last longer, and use a few cubes per feed after warming them up. It is not necessary and not advisable to add any other ingredients like salt and sugar to the puree - they are not good for health. Introduce one new food at a time, with the interval of at least 4 days to let the baby get used to it. In case there is any problems arise (like diarrhea and allergy), it is also easy to know which food may be causing it.

With the same method, we also prepared porridge from 7 months onwards (boil, blend, freeze). We usually fed the baby a mix of porridge with the puree. The former is almost tasteless and the latter can be very sweet (especially pumpkins), so mixing them together make the taste just nice.

From around 8 months, we started to cook porridge everyday for the baby. It was not time consuming with the help of a slow cooker. We used the smallest size of Panasonic slow cooker (1.5L) to cook the porridge. Generally we will put in 3 things into the porridge. First would be a small piece of either pork or chicken meat to add flavor to the porridge. Second would be small pieces of chopped vege - our favourites were cabbage and Chinese cabbage as they don't oxidize easily. Third would be a piece of fish. Put all these with rice and water into the slow cooker in the morning and by noon (after a few hours) the meal is ready. The remaining portion can be kept and reheated for dinner.

In general, from age 1, kids can start taking rice. Just make sure the rice is not too hard/dry and prepare some dish suitable for them like soup, steam pumpkin and steam egg.

For the sake of convenience especially when going out, we also used commercial instant baby food. we found that the local brand of (Malaysia) baby cereals were usually too sweet. My favourite brands were Gerber and Heinz, as I have high confidence in them (as opposed to products from China). We used the jar food which looks like the one on the right. They come in many varieties of flavors including vegetables. What I did was to scoop out the portion to be consumed into a bowl using a clean spoon and feed from the bowl instead of feeding directly from the bottle so that the remaining is not contaminated and can be kept in the fridge for the next meal. As my child grew older they consumed one bottle per feed. Sometimes I also offered the jelly type (fruit flavor) as a desert. As a substitute for the proddige, we used rice cereal that comes in powdery form (also from Gerber/Heinz). Some of them are flavored but I normally used the plain one and mixed with the jar of baby food. Usually, when eating out, I'll bring some powder in a small container and a jar of baby food. During meal time, I just added water to the rice powder to make it into "porridge", and then added the baby food flavor.

As finger food, we bought some baby biscuits for the baby to hold in his/her hand and munch. You can also prepare your own finger food by cutting fruits and cooked/steam vegetables to suitable sizes for the baby.

When introducing new food, it is also important to watch out for food allergies, and introduce the food in stages, especially eggs, nuts and seafood. I may touch on that on my next blog...

Thomas the Tank Engine! (Thomas and Friends)

Thomas the Tank Engine is my son's favourite toy. It started with his aunt giving him a VCD as a present. The show seems boring to us, but he was watching it with great interest. We seldom bought him "non-value-added" (non-educative) toys, but on his 2-year-old birthday, we bought a basic set of Thomas train under the TOMY series for him as a present.

He was very excited and together we built the train tracks. He pushed the Thomas train over the tracks and we said "Peep! Peep!". From his happy face we knew instantly that the purchase was worth it. From then onwards, we started buying Thomas "goods" for him.


As he is interested in anything related to Thomas, it is actually easy for us to motivate him on certain activities. For example, buying Thomas books encourages him to read - in fact, he was potty-trained by reading Thomas books! We bought him Thomas jigsaw puzzles to train him to focus and develop his patience. As a result, at the age of 4 plus, he was already solving 100-pieces of jigsaw puzzles at ease. Nevertheless, he showed less interest to play the non-Thomas jigsaw puzzles. :) When we want to reward him behaving well, we also use Thomas goods as a gift to encourage him. Throughout the years, other than the VCDs, train sets and story books, he has had birthday cake, stickers, bag, towel, stationary, clothings, all with "Thomas"! Luckily in Singapore, there are quite some choices on affordable Thomas goods.

Later we learnt that actually Thomas is a very "value-added" (educative) toys.

• It helps to develop motor skills (putting the tracks together and pushing the train).
  
• By watching the VCD and reading the books, he improved his English language.
• It encourages imagination. My son always murmured to himself when pushing the train, and repeating what he heard in the TV programs.
• It encourages creativity through designing of the tracks. Over the years, my son learnt to do it all by himself and now at 6 years old, he is already an expert in designing the tracks including bridges.

As he loves this toy very much, we also taught him to take good care of the toys and always clean up and put them back after playing. His sister, being influenced by him, is also a big fan of Thomas. When she was a few months old, she started watching her brother play Thomas. One of her first words was "Percy" (one of Thomas' friends) and before she reached the age of 2, she had already recognized all the major characters in Thomas and Friends (Thomas, Percy, James, Gordon, Henry). Although she is a girl, I don't mind at all that she plays trains or cars. To me, it's much better than Barbie dolls.

Children learn most effectively through play. Both my children have certainly benefited from being fans of Thomas. I also fulfilled my childhood dream to own an electric train :). Actually, it's really fun to build tracks and play the train sets, even for adults.

Good TV/DVD Programs for Young Children

Nowadays, TV has become part of our live and there is hardly any families without this black box at home. There is a countless number of TV programs available for children and it's good to be careful and selective on the shows. Good shows can help to supplement our teaching and reinforce the good values. Avoiding long hours of watching TV is also necessary to prevent the strain and deterioration of the eyesight. I typically set the limit to about 30 minutes as I hope that my children (unlike me) will not need glasses, and definitely, not from a young age!

Some programs my children love to watch are:

• Barney - a purple dinosaur from imagination who is a playmate cum teacher. The show is very musical and instills good values like good manners, cleanliness and loving each other. It is typically more popular among girls and children can start watching from age 1. My girl loves Barney a lot! Highly recommended.


• Elmo from the Sesame Streets is a little red puppet who talks in a funny way. Together with other characters like Ernie and Cookie Monster, it is able to attract little children from age 1. Amazingly, before you realize, your kids will have already mastered the ABCs and 123s!


• Thomas and Friends - Thomas the tank engine is one of the most popular characters among boys! Adults may find the TV program quite monotonous but somehow the kids enjoy it. Besides, the standard of English used is quite high especially in terms of vocabulary. My boy is a big fan of Thomas (and my girl as well!). He owns quite a number of Thomas goods including the TOMY series of train playset, books and jigsaw puzzles.


• Bob the Builder exposes the children to the world of constructions (building/fixing houses and roads). His crew members include Scoop the digger, Dizzy the cement mixer, Lofty the crane, Roley the steam roller and many others. My kids start enjoying this show from about age 2.


• Little Einstein is a very good program that my son enjoys watching from about age 4. The 4 characters travel on a rocket that brings the kids to places around the world to accomplish a mission. The children learn about famous spots, cities and countries around the world, musical instruments, famous artists/composers and their works, and basic skills of reading music scores. Highly recommended.


• Dora the Explorer - a bilingual (English and Spanish) adventurous girl who solves problem together with the children along her journey. It often touches on protecting wild animals.

There are other types of programs which is more educational to stimulate the infants' brains or teach the children how to read etc., that I will share in another article in the future.

Just a side note, as my personal preference, I refrain my kids from watching programs that show violence like fighting and shooting (for example, Ben 10 and Power Rangers). I also dislike characters like Barbie doll that introduces materialism to the kids.

When to Enter Preschools?

It is never easy for parents to decide when is a good time for a child to attend preschools or childcare centers (i.e, when there is a choice :)). Like many things in this world, there are pros and cons, give and take.

I personally think that it's best to send the kids to a childcare center between the age of 2-3, as I did with both my children. In fact, I considered sending my son to an infant care center from about 3 months old when I started working! (which is indeed a very rare practice in Penang.) My reasoning is as follows:

• A childcare center is regulated, it has a system that the caregivers need to follow. The staffs in a childcare center are also usually formally trained. A private baby sitter who usually learns from her own experience has all the freedom to do anything without control from anyone. Thus I think the risk is higher for the latter, unless it's someone you know very well and someone you can really trust.
• Although in a childcare center the caregiver usually takes care of more than one infant (usually between 2 to 4 infants), she is 100% focus on her job. A private baby sitter on the other hand is usually a homemaker as well for her family and she often needs to multitask between babysitting and housework, so her attention is not 100% on the infant. Besides, there are some private baby sitters who take care of more than 1 child at home.
• There are usually more than 1 caregiver in the childcare center, or a backup system, so when the caregiver is not around someone else can still help. This does not apply for the private baby sitter. When she's sick or has some personal reason to take leave, there is no other people to back her up except the parents.
• Most childcare centers have programs to stimulate the infants' learning thru visual (flash cards), audio (talk to them, sing), sensor (touch) etc. They have a daily schedule for the infants. For baby sitter who is also a homemaker who multitasks, this is harder (but not impossible) to implement. Sometimes she even has to bring the kids out to run errands - many parents don't like this especially when their kids are still infants.
• In general, I find that childcare centers are more supportive to breastfeeding practice as opposed to a conventional private baby sitter. This is probably because preparing formula milk is more convenient and less time consuming compared to storing and warming up breast milk. Some private baby sitters also have the mentality that breast milk is not sufficient to fill the baby's stomach, this can be quite a barrier to successful exclusive breastfeeding. Some of them also think that they know everything from their experience and are not open to suggestions or new practice.

I think it is better to keep a child before age 2 at home to develop a strong immune system and avoid too much contact with other children as they may get sick easily. However as they grow older, it's good to get the children to start socializing with other non-family members. Compared to the past generation, children nowadays have little contact with people other than the family because everyone is so busy. So by sending them to a childcare, they get to socialize with other children and adults. Besides, the centers usually hold a lot of interesting activities that children enjoy doing together, like singing, playing with toys, sand, water, doh, etc. It is hard to enjoy similar activities at home with only 1 or 2 children, and it isn't worth the effort to prepare or clear the mess for those activities. As for toys, it is imposible, impractical and unaffordable for a family to own many toys. But by sending your kids to childcare centers (which can afford many different types of toys), your kids get the chance to play many varieties of toys. It is good to expose the kids to many different things as they can learn more.

Some fear that the kids will learn the bad habits from the other children in a childcare center. I think this problem may happen at any stage when a person starts socializing with others. As a parent, we need to teach our children to judge good and bad, and this has to be done sooner or later. (One potential problem from homeschooling is whether the child will have the necessary skills to socialize as s/he has less interaction with others.) Sometimes, it is easier to send them at a younger age as they can adapt easily. Of course, every child is unique - some may be ready but some may be not, the same holds true for the parents. Not all parents will be ready and willing to "let go" of their children to preschools at the age of 2-3.

By sending both my children to childcare centers from an early age, I was able to have my own time, own space and to work. I think that even for a full time homemaker who takes care of her own children, it is important to get some time of her own, away from the kids to get refreshed and recharged. Of course every individual is different. Some "supermothers" may be very efficient and may not need her own space, but I still think why not send the child to a childcare center, even for just a few hours per week, to get all the benefits?

Recommended Reading: The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

I was reading this book again - The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, and I decided to share out with you here. Although this book primarily focuses on reviving spouse relationship, the underlying theory can be applied to any relationships, including parent-child relationship. Besides, I believe that good, loving relationship between the parents lays the foundation of a happy family, which is important for the children.

To summarize, all of us express love in many different ways, and this can be categorized into the following "five love languages" - Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service and Physical Touch. Out of five, we have one (or two) "primary" language in which we express our love primarily using that language. We also perceive love from others more easily when it is expressed with our primary language. When two parties speak different languages, they cannot feel the love from each other no matter how hard they try. Understanding and learning the primary language of the other party (be it our spouse or child) enables us to express our love much more effectively and enhance the relationship. It also reduces the feeling and misunderstanding that the other party doesn't love us.

A person whose primary love language is Words of Affirmation loves to hear positive words of encouragement, appreciation and praising in order to feel loved.

A person whose primary love language is Quality Time needs undivided attention. It means setting some specific time for activities together like talking(no TV in between!), going for a walk, picnic, playing games etc.

A person whose primary love language is Receiving Gifts enjoys the excitement of receiving gifts and values the gifts. It does not have to be something expensive as long as it comes with a thought. It can be handmade, it can also be intangible like your presence at some occasions.

Acts of Service includes doing house chores, running errands and helping with anything that the other party values.

Physical Touch could be hugs, kisses, holding hands, a pat on the shoulder etc.

Sometimes we may do everything to express our love but miss out the primary language of the other party, and just because of that the other party will perceive that we don't love him/her! Thus it is important to understand and speak the love language of the person you love so that you can communicate your love effectively and build a loving relationship.

Obviously from a short passage I can only tell you a little about this book's content. I strongly recommend this book as it surely is a very good resource to improve relationships. It's very easy to read and you will not be able to take your hands off the book once you started. :) You can also check out other variations of this book including "The Five Love Languages of Children" and "The Five Love Languages of Teenagers", which are more specific and related to the topic parenting. Happy reading!

My Breastfeeding Experience and Tips (Part 2)

What I dread most in breastfeeding was... engorgement! This is a phase that every breastfeeding mother will go through, and some can be very tough to overcome.

For my first baby, although I did not have a lot of excess milk, I still experienced engorgement from time to time. The situation became worse, as I returned to work 4 months after delivery.

My engorgement was normally due to blocked ducts in some areas of my breast, so sometimes only part of the breast was harden and I might even feel one (or more) hard "pipe" on my breast where the milk was stucked! (It felt something like the root of a plant.) I tried massaging and applying warm cloth (or a milk bottle with hot water inside) on my breast, hopefully to drain the milk. It required a lot of patience and effort, and most of the time I exhausted myself before I could clear the engorgement. To reduce the pain in the breast and nipple, I also tried applying ice pad or cold cabbage on my breast, especially on the nipple. I found myself always in a dilemma, wondering if I should apply hot or cold objects on my breast. On one hand, I wanted to clear the engorgement; on the other hand, I had to protect my nipple from getting hurt so that I could continue breastfeeding. The most effective way was to let the baby suck out the milk, but the tricky part was that sometimes as he sucked, more milk was produced (more demand -> more supply) and the "pipe" became even harder! I couldn't use breast pump because it hurt a lot and it wasn't as effective as the baby's natural suck. A lot of times, I ended up going to the clinic to get some medicine to help to soften my breast. Most of the time, it was my baby who was my savior, or the medicine that helped, or the combination of both. It was such a relief every time my engorgement was cleared...

In the first four months, as I breastfed my baby directly most of the time, I had less problem with engorgement. But as soon as I returned to work and started using breast pump to extract my breast milk, I started to have frequent engorgement, at least twice per month that required visits to clinic to get the medicine. This happened because no breast pump could compare with direct breastfeeding to drain my breast. I first used Medela's electric breast pump, and later on switched to Avent manual breast pump. Although I found the latter more comfortable, it did not help much with my engorgement problem. Direct breastfeeding was still the best. I prefer the Avent manual pump because it is less noisy and more convenient - There is no need to use an adapter; although an electric pump can be battery operated as well, the battery does not last long. However, I haven't tried out the recent double breast pump (pump both sides at the same time), which I heard is efficient and saves time.

Another problem was my reduced milk supply once I started working. Breastfeeding my baby directly was the best way to trigger the supply of breast milk, and even the best breast pump had no way to compete. Returning to work also means busier life for me to cope, and more or less it did impact my breast milk production. I found it really challenging to continue breastfeeding exclusively while working on a full time job, even in my case where both my employer and my boss were very supportive. (Intel worldwide provides the facility of mother's room to enable working mothers to extract breast milk at work.) It was very stressful for me, struggling to cope with the demand of my baby with the reduced milk supply while facing the frequent engorgements that led to visits to clinic for the medicine...

Anyway, I eventually got through this tough time, and reached the milestone - 6 months after birth, I started giving formula milk to mix with my breast milk and across the next few months, slowly reducing breastfeeding. Luckily, this phase of weaning off breast milk was a smooth transition for my baby and me without any problem.

My second baby was born almost 4 years later, and this time I was much more prepared and experienced. It was a good start as I had more than enough breast milk from the moment she was born. I started storing breast milk in the freezer from the very first month and during the peak my freezer was occupied with about 35 milk bottles! (with the average of 5oz/bottle). Some people may use special disposable plastic bags or containers to store breast milk, but I found it convenient to use cheap milk bottles just to store the milk, as it was easy to pump directly into the bottle, to read and label the volume(e.g. 6oz), to transport the milk (from office to home), and to heat up the milk by soaking the milk bottles in hot water (Never use microwave to heat up breast milk as it will kill the nutrition!). The breast milk would be transferred to Dr. Brown's milk bottle of better quality to feed my baby.

Second baby sounds easy? True for the initial phase as I did not have to relearn how to breastfeed, resulting in less muscle pain in neck and back. But I had the same problem, may be even worse, with engorgement, because contrary to my first baby, this time my milk supply was more than my baby's demand, and I returned to work after only 2 months. Having too much milk can also be a problem! Although I extracted breast milk twice a day in office, at least once per week I would be facing engorgement problem, sometimes minor and cured within 24 hours, sometimes more serious and needed medicine... Again, I struggled through, until my baby was fully breastfed for 6 months. I was very unwilling to reduce and stop breastfeeding with so much milk supply (as most mothers struggle to keep up with demand), but I could not bare with the engorgement problem and had to let go eventually...

I found my breastfeeding experience for both kids equally challenging, probably because I really wanted to breastfeed them exclusively for the first six months without formula milk. Thinking back now, I think I might have tried too hard and could have let go a little. As long as I had tried my best, I shouldn't feel bad or guilty or stressful about it... Breastfeeding may be the best for the baby (and the mother), but I do not think that it should come to the extend of straining the mother. On the other hand, if I had thought that way from the very beginning, just trying my best without setting a 6 months target, I might have failed without a strong will to succeed.

I would strongly recommend at least 6 months of exclusive breastfeeding, if possible direct breastfeeding would be even better as it saves a lot of trouble, but that may be difficult for working mothers especially in Asia as we usually return to work after 2-3 months' maternity leave. I have a few friends (all are stay-at-home-mums) who managed to breastfeed their kids until 2 years old, but most working mothers breastfeed less than a year. However, it's still not an excuse to stop breastfeeding any time before 6 months - let me share a true story - a mother to a newborn in Penang worked as a sales person who was on the road frequently, and she often extracted breast milk in her car by the road side, covering the windows. I really salute this lady! She makes me feel ashamed every time I complain that extracting breast milk ("comfortably" in the mother's room at my work place) is troublesome. If she can do that, what excuse do the rest of us in the office or at home have for not able to fully breastfeed our babies?

Breastfeeding is indeed a very tough job, and every mother may face different challenges. Love, patience, perseverance and endurance led me through. I was exhausted all the time, I felt helpless whenever engorgement happened, from time to time I felt that I could not continue anymore... Strong support and encouragement from family members and friends with breastfeeding experience certainly helped me to get through this. Thank you to all of you. Also thank you to Penang Adventist Hospital's Breastfeeding Support Group, especially Ms. Christine Neoh who was guiding the group. I wish that every new mother could get the same support as me. I wish that more mothers would succeed in breastfeeding, because it's the best for you and your baby!

My Breastfeeding Experience and Tips (Part 1)

Before I became pregnant, I had never thought much about breastfeeding (well, who would?). However, I did have the thought of wanting to breastfeed my baby to decrease the likelihood of getting breast cancer, the disease that took my mother away from my family.

Knowing nothing much about breastfeeding, I attended the antenatal class prepared by Penang Adventist Hospital in which I was going to deliver my baby. The speaker was a peaditrician, Dr. Pong Kwai Meng. Within an hour, he shared with us the importance of breastfeeding, the difficulties we might face and the possible solutions, the myths of breastfeeding etc. He was indeed a breastfeeding guru. He joked that the only thing he lacked of was the hands-on breastfeeding experience - because a man can't possibly breastfeed! Among the statements that I remember clearly were, "Cow milk is meant for cow, human should take human milk", "Nothing can replace breast milk. What your baby needs most is not an expensive toy nor pretty clothes, but your breast milk". I thank Dr. Pong for enlighting my spouse and I about breastfeeding. Without his talk and his support in the later days as my son's peadiatrician, I would not have succeeded in breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is the most challenging task I have ever faced in my life and I had a very tough time. (comparable to handling my mother's death, or rather, managing my emotions to face her sickness as well as her death.)

Before my delivery I was very determined and all prepared mentally to breastfeed exclusively my baby for as long as possible, at least for the first 6 months. However, breastfeeding did not "just happen naturally". It needs to be learnt and it takes practice to master the skill. Like holding a newborn for the first time, I felt so awkward trying to adjust my position, turning the baby towards my breast, making sure he latched on properly, and when everything was set, I had to remind myself to relax. My baby boy who was born after 36 hours of labor pain was a very impatient infant. When he was hungry he would start crying and his voice got louder with each passing second, until he got the milk in his mouth. It always took a while before he was able to latch on properly and after a few failures, he would start screaming until his face turned red. I needed to try again and again, putting his mouth next to my breast until the position was right. Finally, when he could latch on properly, he would start to calm down. However, the first few sucks were always so strong (because he was hungry) that I almost screamed as it hurt. In addition, as a first time mother, my breast milk was not produced instantly; because he did not get enough food for each feed, within an hour or two he would start crying again. The cycle repeated. By the end of the thrid day, I was so exhausted, both physically and mentally. I had painful nipples due to frequent sucking; my neck and back ached as a result of long attempts to breastfeed; I did not have enough sleep. This was the time I was discharged from the hospital and I could not get help or support from nurses anymore at home.

I was fortunate that my husband was as determined as I was to make exclusive breastfeeding a success. Without his support I would not have succeeded. We did not purchase any infant milk powder at home and the only food the baby could get was my breast milk. Again and again, we tried and tried, ignoring "friendly advice" and nags from the confinement lady (For Chinese in Asia, it's common to hire a confinement lady to help taking care of mummy and baby for one month after delivery) that my breast milk was not sufficient and the baby was starving. As my son's name suggests, determination is the key to success. By the end of the first week, we were coping well and the only problem was the sharp pain I had to endure during the first few sucks after latching on. By the end of the second week, I could multitask while breastfeeding - reading a book, talking on phone, even surfing Internet! Practice makes perfect! I found pillows very useful to support my hand during breastfeeding. I also used lying down position to breastfeed sometimes, especially at nights so that I could rest while breastfeeding.

It's a wonderful feeling once you master the skills. I enjoyed every moment when I breastfed, knowing that's the best for both of us, and seeing the baby enjoying the milk was the best of motherhood. In terms of nutrition, breast milk is the best, babies can absorb everything and digest very fast, some (including my son) pooh after every feed with watery stools. They also feel most secure and comfortable in mummy's arm, sucking mummy's breast milk. As I breastfed my baby exclusively, I did not need to prepare nor boil milk bottles. When I went out with my baby, I did not need to pack a bag for milk bottles, milk powder and warm water. When the baby needed a feed, I just needed to find a place to breastfeed him. Nowadays most shopping malls prepare such facilities to support breastfeeding mothers. Or sometimes I did it in the car. I found it convenient to wear breastfeeding bra with a breastfeeding pad (to absorb breast milk when it leaks) under a T-shirt. I prefer washable pad to disposable as I found it more comfortable and cost-saving.

For a mother who plans to return to work, or to be away from the baby sometimes, it's best to start pumping breast milk in between the feeds as early as possible and storing them in the fridge so that someone else can feed the baby when the mother is away. Breast milk can last 6 hours under normal room temperature, 3 days in fridge and 3 months in freezer. As a first time mother, it was tough for me to stock up the breast milk in the fridge as I hardly had any left after each feed and I was tired most of the time. But to make sure that I had at least sufficient if not extra breast milk for the baby, I drank a lot of liquid, including water, soup, milk. Warm liquid especially will trigger milk production almost immediately. I also tried to rest as much as possible, relax, be happy... all these help in producing breast milk. Massaging the breast can help to improve milk flow. The most important point however, is mentality. If you believe that you do not have enough breast milk for the baby, then you will not. Parents start to give babies supplement (milk powder) thinking they do not have enough from breast milk, causing less demand on breast milk, and less supply to be produced. The actual fact is that every mother has the ability to produce enough milk for her baby. When the baby sucks it will trigger the production of breast milk and our body will naturally adjust to provide the right amount of breast milk. It's a simple theory of supply and demand. There will only be supply if there is demand.

I was happy and proud that I went through the first hurdle to be able to breastfeed my baby exclusively. The next challenge is, how long can it last? My next challenge came as I returned to work...

...to be continued...

Medicine for Young Children

My children have been having respiratory problem lately - cough, running nose, sore throat, and even led to middle ear infection! Common oral medicines prescribed by doctors to relieve the symptoms, mostly in syrup (liquid) mode, include Diphenhydramine, Chlorpheniramine (Piriton), Bromhexine, Cetirizine (brand name Zyrtec), Rhinathiol (cough), and sometimes antibiotic Amoxycillin. Fluimucil is used to reduce phlegm.

For middle ear infection, the following antibiotic was prescribed (which can also be used for conjunctivitis) - Framycetin Eye/Ear Drop - which unfortunately did not cure my son's fever after 6 days, and he was switched to the oral antibiotic Augmentin.

The other medicines according to my experience with my children are as follows:

For fever, the most commonly used medicine is Paracetamol (Acetaminophen) (brand names Panadol, Dhamol, Uphamol, Tylenol etc.). Sometimes Voltaren suppositories (to be inserted into the rectum) may be used on very young children to reduce the temperature quickly. Voltaren is a type of NSAID (non-standard anti-inflammatory drugs) and should not be used together with other NSAIDS such as Ibuprufen (brand name Advil) and Aspirin , both oral medicines which could be prescribed for fever (however Aspirin should not be prescribed to children at all time!). Voltaren may have some side effects - patients are advised to drink a lot of water (as with all other drugs!). Other means to reduce the temperature include wiping the forehead / body with cold towel. I find some commercial products to attach cold pads on the forehead useful, although not every child may like it. My son even had an "ice-bath" when he had very high fever at the age of 3 years old.

For diarrhea, we have used Maalox, Smecta, Lacteol and Kaolin. I usually switch from milk powder to soy powder. However, for infant below 1 year old on breast milk, they often have very soft tools as they digest the breast milk very well. Normally this is nothing to worry about. Constipation is more of a headache! I used prune juice on infants to help bowel movements.

For infant colic, Colimix is common. Personally, I find Dr. Brown's milk bottle quite a good product to prevent colic, but nothing can compare to direct breastfeeding.

I believe in natural cure and try not to take medicine whenever possible but lots of time, it is not possible. Also, due to their interaction with other children from child care center, they get sick easily. Anyway, to keep your kids healthy it's important to let them exercise regularly, eat a balance diet, drink lots of water, may be take some supplements, BUT one very important key that cannot be undone is to breastfeed the baby for as much and as long as possible - breastfeed exclusively if you can, at least for the first 6 months. It will play a crucial role to your children's health and it can only be done at that point of time. In fact, for infants, breast milk is the medicine to cure most of the sickness, if any. Nothing can replace breast milk. I guess I will write another entry on breastfeeding, soon.

Disclaimer: The above are all based on my knowledge, experience and research online as a parent and is meant for your reference only. Please consult your physician for professional advice on proper drugs and dosage.

A topic for my blog - parenting

I have decided to give my blog a topic, instead of just a blog for me to "blah" anything. I have been silent for a while, partly because I am not sure what to write. Too much freedom can be a problem... that's what I have been facing.. Anyway, by having a focus topic on my blog, it will be easier for me to work on, with an objective in mind.

Actually I have been thinking of this long before I created a blog. I have 2 young children at home, approaching the age of 6 and 2. There are lots of experience I gained from bringing up them, and I have been sharing with my friends on these valuable experience, which I think is beneficial. On the other hand, I also frequently search online for resources on childcare. So, why not just use this channel to share out my experience and benefit more people.

I have lots of ideas about good toys or education kits for children. I can share some problems and solutions with eating, sleeping, discipline, etc. Perhaps some tips on fun activities we can do together with the kids and on travelling (I have been through a lot!) . The very first thing I would like to share is the medicines for young children - since my children have been sick lately.

So the goal will be to share out my parenting experience and hopefully we will enjoy bringing up our children in a loving and fun manner. Enjoy reading my blog!

Reflections 感言

I remember the years when I was studying in Japan, I had my homepage attached with Osaka University, and I would write "some sort of a diary" to jot down the happenings, at least once per month. I also wrote a few articles to remember my mother and a dear friend who had passed away. I kept all those in a CD when I left Japan and moved back to my hometown. Unfortunately 2 years ago when I took the CD out to share some of the articles with my friends, the CD was physically broken by accident. I almost stopped breathing when I saw the CD, as the contents was such a treasure to me. There was no way to retrieve the data. I tried finding other copies in my old laptops but until today I haven't found it, may be I haven't tried hard enough, due to everyday's busy schedule. I will definitely try again.

However, although I might have lost them physically, they are still part of me and in some sense they will never be lost as long as I still have memory. This is the same with lots of other things in life. We may lose a friend, but the friendship and happy moments we shared with the person will never be lost as they had been part of our life. Likely, we may lose a job, but the job experience will remain with us. Whatever challenges we face in life is to lead to a better future, whatever failure we face in life is only temporary and the lesson we learn from the failure will help us to self-improve if we choose to look at it in a positive way. The choice is in our hands.

The world is facing an economical challenge now. I wish everyone good luck in keeping your job and be strong and tough to face whatever challenges ahead. Remember, at the end of the tunnel, there is always light!

My first blog...

Finally, I have created my own blog! There are many times in life when we talk and talk but we don't act. This is a very good example. Anyway, I am glad that I have finally acted. I love to write and this will be a good channel for me to release my thoughts and possibly release my stress. :) Hope to write more and hope you enjoy reading it.